There’s no easy way to describe a fistula-in-ano. It’s basically a big nasty infected anal gland that has ruptured to the surface of the buttocks, thus creating a duct that continues to get clogged with faeces, and in turn repeatedly gets infected.
So how’s your dinner tasting?
It’s not quite as bad as it sounds. We’re talking the proportions of a bad pimple rather than some sort of bubonic boil. Unfortunately for wee Ollie, a fistula is something that doesn’t fix itself with any amount of time or antibiotics, so it was off to the surgery.
I had thought that general anaesthetic for a micro-guy is a fairly major deal, but after discussing with the anaesthetist, I realised that for minor procedures there is not a heck of a lot to worry about. No IV drugs, no tubes down the throat. But even so, handing over our little bundle of coolness to a stranger (albeit a highly qualified one) was very scary.
So Ollie’s end has ended up with a wee gash in it where the offending fistula has been laid-open and cauterised. As is his usual style, he seems entirely unconcerned with the whole rigmarole, and wonders why his parents seem to be fussing so much over nappy changes today.
Thankfully the insurance company has acted extremely unlike an insurance company, and offered to cover Ollie for the procedure, because he gets three months of lee-way in which he is covered under his Mum’s policy. I was rather surprised, because after having worked in the investment industry, I had become resigned to the fact that it is an insurance company’s sole purpose in life to not pay out on claims.
I’m being totally serious here. From a shareholder perspective, if you own shares in an insurance company, then you should be congratulating that company for every claim that they turn down, and doubly so if that claim was in fact valid.
I expect in this particular instance, the insurance company in question will have piles of research that tells them that covering newborns for free will cause 82.5% of parents to pay regular premiums for their children for 18 years, out of sheer guilt and thankfulness.