Ok, now we’re in trouble.
Not only have I offended mum-to-be’s sensibility by implying that she seemed much more prepared for Ollie’s arrival than I, but she has disclosed that just like me, she has no fricken idea.
What now!? Neither of us has the foggiest idea what to do when we get home from the hospital. Sure, I guess you stick the little thing in some nappies and clothes, make up the bassinet and jam it in there, but what then?
At this stage of pregnancy, we have many, many kind suggestions, gifts (including a stretch-n-grow that I swear is big enough for a five year-old) and edicts from all and sundry. Most of these are welcome and very comforting, but some border on the bizzare. One of my favourites is the scheduled feeding suggested in Baby Wise. Sure, I can understand that developing a routine with baby is a great idea, but waking your baby from dead sleep because it’s feeding time seems a little extreme. Apparently it suggests a ‘cold flannel on the baby’s back’ if it does not wake up. Nice.
Taking all of these good and bad suggestions, I think I’ve come up with a personal approach to babying that should just about cover it: The minute things start to happen birth-wise, check all your preconceptions at the door, strap in, and hang on for the ride of your life.
Give me a couple of weeks and I’ll let you know how it goes.
On an entirely different note, I was swiping my Foodtown card at the supermarket yesterday, and started to wonder: ‘just what the blimming heck does Foodtown do with all this data?’. We use the card because it ends up saving about $10-$15 on a $200 shop, but I am also dimly aware that it logs all our purchases against the “late-20-something, white, agnostic, partially-sane” demographic (you did tick that one on the last census didn’t you?).
So I’m wondering if Foodtown is slowly building up this data so that they can ‘enhance’ our shopping experience at some stage. I can just see it now, you’ll rock on up to the checkout, and on scanning a particular item that does not match your demographic profile, the teller says:
– “So Mr Gracewood, the new baby has arrived then!?”, or
– “Now should you really be buying that sticky pink bun? Doesn’t fit in with your low-carb diet does it now?”, or
– “Off the wagon again are we?”